BEAUTIFUL PICTURES OF MYSELF AND MY FAMILY COMING

SOON!!!

WE PUT THE "FUN" IN DYSFUNCTIONAL

There will be updates on this story as it progresses. There is court on December 20. Merry Christmas to me. Check back here after that date to see how this ridiculous story ends.

November 20, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. I'm done with this ... aren't you? I'm glad I am not sullying myself any further by having this on an actual Bigfoot site. Again ... I would like to reiterate here that I am not and I have never considered myself a Bigfoot researcher. I think that denotes WAY more schooling than I have had at this point, so I saw a bigfoot and my life went KABOOM!!!

There are many orginazations that are trustworthy and responsible, and you should really check into it if you want to get involved with your story. 

What I think is that ... we dream.

We dream of our picture of God and eternity. We dream about hope and we make pictures in our very soul's that we create to see us through this place we travel in. I believe that when we see things through our childlike eyes we are able to find awe in the mysteries. I do not think that they are to be mocked or even discounted, I believe that each one of us has a personal mystery that drives us along. I found that bigfoot and it drove me. I want to share my story with you. It will not be a typical bigfoot journey because it was more like a vision quest. It was a beautiful and fullfilling experience. 

November 15, 2007

I have been throwing up a lot since EB has been "adding" to my book.

I have been having the unfortunate experience in dealing with Jon-Erik Beckjord. What will transpire from here on may or may not make it onto this webpage, but there are going to be some things going on ... you can be sure.

First of all, I am going to continue writing my life story. True. There have been moments like the one I am enduring right now, but I am rest assured that this too ... will pass. This man is lying and he doesn't even realize what he has done. Not that he is crazy in anyway that would get him out of being accountable when it all comes out, but crazy in an evil way. I have done none of the things he is accusing me of, and I don't know where he's getting his information. It is skewed.

He has been emailing me behind the scenes of his webpage with some scary and disturbing information. He knows the names of my children and places we have lived. He is stalking me on the internet with creepy letters. All he had to do was apologize for hitting me and starnding me and spraying me with pepper spray ... etc. "Had", is the operational word there.

I went on Tom Biscardi's radio show, and before we went on air we talked and made ammends. I am confident that Tom would live up to any agreement we made when they were here in my yard. I thank him, and anyone involved in helping speak my mind and tell the story.

Why do people get away with hurting others? Why?

Well, I will fill in any holes that need filling if the time comes for that, and i will be sure to put here how this story ends. Unfortunately it is not over. Not yet. I won't put here what I have been doing for the time being though. I wouldn't want to tip him off to anything else he might want to devour, so I'll wait for the end to finish ... how's that?

Please do not judge me until this is over. We all get judged in the end and I have nothing to fear from that. I didn't want to go into real fine details of my father's suicide, but I will write that out too. That story ends with God's grace and a lot of love. You won't want to miss it.

I gave my daughters advise when I left my abusive marriage and I would like to share that with any of you ...

I said,"Don't you ever let a man do to you, what I let your father do to me."

Don't let Jon-Erik Beckjord hurt you like I let him hurt me. Please. 

September 20, 2007

I can't believe these posts from EB. His lies are blatant. He is a freak. I wanted to hit him. He was so pathetic. I'm scared and I am mad at myself right now.

How can I be so stupid!

I have to show my website to my family so they can read it. I have to go and look at all the emails I have gotten from EB that I have not read yet. I saved them all though. I am very tired. I'll start dealing with this later. I need to go and write to the "alien" author people. I don't completely buy it, but there are so many common experiences I have that are exactly the same. Maybe I can find compitent people who may help me with my several dilemmas.

I need help. The alien thing kind of disturbed me.

September 20, 2007 later that night

I read yesterday that the United States Government is enacting congress to disband the Cherokee Nation! Jesus help us! Please help us!

My hand writing is lousy right now because I had to beat Sublime off of Harry Potter last night. Are you laughing? None of most of this is funny, but what I just said is ... yeah, kind of funny. Sublime is my daughter's Australian shepherd and Harry Potter is my Skipperky/mutt river dog. Harry is younger and gentler than Sublime and Sublime had Harry's head and mouth in his mouth, and, well, he was doing the best he could to kill my dog. I instinctively punched Sublime off Harry and I paid with a broken pinky. Did'nt hurt Sublime at all. Funny huh? I'll break my finger saving my dog, but I won't stand up for myself in front of a maniac like Jon-Erik Beckjord.

I don't know what to do lord. I feel torn in so many ways. I tried to talk to Austin today about all the things I have been going through, what is going wrong with me. She would have none of it, and I don't blame her because the last year and a half has been so ... strange in so many ways. My finger hurts so much that I have to stop writing for the moment.

OUCH!!!

NONE OF THIS IS FUNNY!!!

I've stopped writing my everyday stuff because it just keeps coming.

I'm watching Dark City. Earlier today one of my little friends showed me a clock, told me she knew where my "little head" was ... she pointed at the top of my head. She said she would help me find it. She also said "they" did'nt know where I was, that I was hidden, and she would help hide me. She's four. Jesus said to consider the children. I listen to kids.

I told my friend Rocky about the Cherokee bill thing and I asked her to tell her brother for me. My other little friend went to a Big and Rich concert in Medford with her grandma. I have never been to a big concert. She's six. She says she is going to see Rascal flats next. Lucky kid.

September 22, 2007

How can any of these things that I have been writing about, (other than this EB buisness for the moment. That has been real enough already ...) be real?

Here now is a note to explain once again that this is a journal entry I am explaining my EB story 'in'. (News Flash to Tara, I am going to be writing about my cool spiritual experiences on another page. Far away from this mess. You will find them on the FrontPage. They will be updated regularly.) I have been taught to dream. I do ... a lot. There are going to be places like here, that tell my odd adventure of the last four years and what it has meant to me. I am also trying to figure out what has happemed to me since I had a surgical procedure two years ago that has left me with what I am beginning to call the transformation of my childhood beliefs. I'll explain them as I go along and if you have questions you can make comments. I'll try to answer the best I can. I am searching, so maybe you can help me too. Unfortunately this is how I met EB, but even two weird bigfoot researchers can't kill my faith in humanity. I'll keep keeping on.

I feel like someone/thing  is trying to convince me that I am more or less than myself.

This a.m. I suddenly awoke at 4:30. I was sitting at the diningroom table when Hanna, my Blue Queensland Heeler, started barking viciously towards the yard, through the sliding glass door. Tonight as I have been sitting reading "Communion", by Whitley Striber, I have decided to look into the alien encounters thing. I never have. The coincidences are too uncanny to ignore. I have experienced a lot of this same stuff. Anyway, Hanna once again started barking towards the door, hysterically down the hall and then out into the yard again.

I said, "I am sick of this shit", At this point I really believe that this is how I am beginning to feel. Whoever these things are, or whatever they are, I feel they are cowards. Why can't they be kind, decent, honest, ... real.

I'm not scared at the moment more than I am getting angry. I don't know what is doing this. I SWEAR I saw a bigfoot in my yard two years ago. I saw that damn thing three times, and it has been a nightmare with people ever since. I honestly wish I had never told anyone now. I know of at least two dozen people here who have seen them. They are real and I have no doubt about it. What is going on at my house is so much more than seeing a bigfoot. I do not care to ever have an "expert" ever come to my house again though, and if you are an "expert", and you show up at my house as one I might just put you in the hospital ... so keep to emails and comments. Thank you.

Anyway, I am an extremely spiritual person ... always have been ... no apologies ... and I refer to God and Jesus a lot because they are simply my creed. I do have an extremely open mind also, so all this works for me. I am just trying to figure this out just like everybody else. lol

Oh yeah, and I will have a page entitled Tara Hauki and Tom Biscardi for your perusal. It's unfortunately a story of unabated greed, but no one really knows about bigfoot and maybe bigfoot is the 'creature' as they all like to call them that is supposed to ferret out these freaks anyway and they have chosen me as thier inpromptu ambassador. If the job saves and protects children and elders from predators and thieves then I have to say I think I'm up for the job. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. That's funny!

Why does this thing seem to be toying with me? There is so much going on with me now. Every action, every word, evry thing I do, see, hear, smell, evrything I do correlates around me. I don't know how to explain this. It feels so wonderful. A miracle. And yet it is so foreign and scary at the same time. I must write of these things, and I share them because perhaps there are those of you who also experience these things. If there are those of you, then just knowing that could calm my fears.

I talked to a friend this morning and told her that it is almost as if I can hear inside of sound now. What the hell? It's the only way I can explain it. This is a friend who has been through my whole xperience with me and I feel safe saying these radically strange things to her. I started praying once as I walked in the rain. I heard the rythum of the earth in the sounds and I learned to plug in to the sound of God. It started working, and now it won't stop. I seem to hear all of it now. No matter what. I can see, smell, hear, feel layers within layers of everything around me.

I am feeling watched from on the hill above my house again.

I have been trying to ignore the lights in the sky, and all of the other things that keep happening around me ... but they are still there.

Why is this happening to me? I ask this a lot.

September 23, 2007 noon

I slept in, but I'm still very tired. The doctor in Jackson told me to go home and sleep for four days, and drink lots of water. When I was in the ambulance the crew told me my core was cold and my blood pressure was low, which they said were symptoms of exposure. The doctor did not know I had to take a ten hour bus ride home. I'll make up for it.

Jon-Erik is a bad man, potentially, and that is even scarier. I would normally not get this brutely honest about someones shortcomings ...

BUT HE HIT ME THREE TIMES. AND LEFT ME FOR DEAD, BECAUSE HE WAS AFRAID OF GETTING CAUGHT FOR HURTING ME.

I am completely sick of that!!!

He's an angry old man because he ruined his life, or as he would put it ... he chance for fame. He has cancer, diabetes, and heart disease and he blames God for it. Angry indeed. I have had fibromyalgia for twenty years now and I have never blamed God for that. Child molesters ... I do blame God for, but plain illness is life. I don't blame God for life. This guy used the whole "I'm sick" thing to get me to continue with him. Why did'nt he tell me he had cancer before we left. It is not wise to go out like that when your sick. He should have known that . No, he waited to tell me he had cancer when I told him I wanted to go home from the lodge. After his drunk girlfriend drove away with all the supplies we needed to be able to stay. He refused to take me home from there and then he gave me the necklace and the little bear he had given to his girlfriend. He suddenly had to tell me he had cancer, and then he made me go look at the lipstick on the mirror in the bedroom. Then he gave me the "gifts", and he even said they were compensation for the "trouble" I had been through so far on our trip. I wanted to go home at that time. I was done, but he convinced me to stay, so I did.

September 24, 2007

I went to the computer center today and wrote out some of the Jon-Erik ordeal. Why am I such a freak magnet?

I have forgotten some of the sordid details, I was in shock. I can see that now as I read over it. I went over to Joann's and Jack's for dinner tonight. They chastised me for being so dumb. Let's face that O.K.? Joann told me I should share my story to keep other women from falling into the same trap.

The more I talk about it, the more it seems he was baiting me. Jon-Erik I mean. My friends keep using words like "kidnapping", and "hostage". When he said he would'nt feed me I felt just like that.

September 25, 2007 Thursday

I wrote more from my website about Jon-Erik today. I read his website just before I left the computer center. He is saying now that I took that necklace and that I threw all three of those books he gave me into the creek. The alien book was by his tent when I left. He says he threw my jade and my Biscardi notes into the creek because "I threw his in first". Oh well, he sprayed me with pepper spray because I caught him going through my bag, (through my clothes, my sundries, my journals and books.) He mentions again that I hit him in the face with that shovel.

I wonder if his girlfriend Christine Pitts will tell the truth of how he hit his face taking the jack off his rig when he had that flat tire. A sheriff drove by right when it happened too. I have copied all his posts, and continue to do so. His story has changed around fifteen times at the least since this all first started. He has even taken a lot of it off of his site. Too late though. I have been saving all of it, and so has other people I know. I'm not lying. I was hurt by this man and he is lying to cover his ass. I am tired of being abused like this.

I cannot believe the level that this man has gone to, to slander me the way he has been doing. Like I said, he is trying to cover his ass.

How can anyone even pay any attention to this fruitloop? All of this won't be posted until I write the whole story out. I don't even know how to get it recognized. I know one thing right now. I know I am done with bigfoot researchers. What a bunch of evil nuts.

I'm done with my foray into bigfoot research. The real guys are right ... there is no such thing as bigfoot researchers, only people who see bigfoot.

On to the next something to do ...

P.S.  If anyone is so inclined to go up there and get that jade, then help yourself. You can find it easily. It is approximately 7 inches, by 17 inches, by 6 inches, and it was weighed at just under 12 lbs. I had a good friend who is very knowledgeable about Happy Camp jade look at it, and he had two other people look at it, and they used the word phenomenal to describe it, and told me it was worth in the neighborhood of four hundred dollars. I intended to sell it to reimburse EB for the bus ticket. It should'nt be so hard to find since it is laying in about 6 ft. of water at the deepest. I can't believe he is saying he took dive gear to find it. That's hilarious.

P.S.S. Oops!!! The notes I had with me were the wrong notes. I have the Tom Biscardi notes safe and secure at my house. I did have the beginning of that story on those notes and we here in Happy Camp are seeing the results of my notes on EB's website already. He actually told me he would steal, lie, or cheat to get his stuff. I'm glad he did'nt say kill. At least there's that.